When the music hits me...I feel no pain                                                           Photo Credit: Emanuel Love Photography

When the music hits me...I feel no pain                                                           Photo Credit: Emanuel Love Photography

It’s been a week of intense emotions.  America just concluded one of the most divisive and hate filled elections in history and there are many, including myself, who have been pondering the future of this country.  Since election night, Television and social media have been overflowing with hateful rhetoric, fear, sadness, depression, anger and confusion. Since Tuesday evening, I’ve seen protests, fighting, arguing, violence and bulling in schools and workplaces. This has been a very dark week for most of us. 

I find solace in house music and our world-wide community in times like these. We are an inclusive community. We have always welcomed anyone who has a love for the music regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation or religion to party and groove with us. This inclusive scene is filled with so many different individuals from a variety of backgrounds.  It gives me hope that we will cease to be so divided but reflect the beauty of our diversity. Many of my friends are openly struggling to find hope in the midst of what seems to be nothing but darkness.  This election has brought so much hate to the forefront of our lives, police brutality is on the rise, and urban communities are struggling with violence daily.  In the midst of poverty, unemployment, economic and educational inequality, racism, sexism, homophobia, religious discrimination and so much more, I've found myself trying to find some “light". 

During times like these, music often becomes a form of therapy.  I've heard people say, "House Music is a spiritual thing". In many ways it really is.  House music lovers gather in clubs united by the music looking for the same thing...Peace…a escape... a moment of freedom in a stress free environment. We crave the joy and the happiness that this music brings.  We love the comradery that we share while out with friends.    That's what I love about House parties.  I get to take the stress off even if just for a moment.  I get to laugh and smile in spite of whatever is going on in my personal life.  I have seen people leave their cares, worries and burdens on a dance floor and leave a party uplifted.  At times I've heard a DJ play a song that has left me in tears because it spoke to me so deeply.  I have seen dancers scream and shout their way back to joy on dance floors across this city.   These are not uncommon sights at some parties because the music touches our souls in a very intimate way.  In the same way pastors touch a soul on a Sunday afternoon, DJ's communicate through the music delivering messages of hope, joy, love peace and freedom.  In these cases, the music becomes like water, cleansing and purifying to the soul. 

In house music, I find joy, peace and release.  There’s too much to be sad about in the world today. I have to find the joy, the hope, the peace and the love in it. Otherwise, what’s the point?  In spite of what I see, I have to believe there is reason to keep moving forward, to keep fighting the good fight and to enjoy life in spite of its harshness.   Thank goodness for House Music. It is one of the things I rely on to keep my spirit sane during dark and crazy times.  

I wanted to share a small portion my personal list of house and dance songs from some of my favorite artists and DJ’s that uplift me, give me hope and just make me feel good.  Hope you enjoy!


My Personal Self Care Playlist

(find most of these songs on


  • Terry Hunter and Jon Pierce “The Message”

  • Temika Moore and Josh Milan “Every Word”

  • Dawn Tallman, Josh Milan “For Me”

  • 3 Winans Brothers featuring the Clark Sisters “Dance”

  • Eli Escobar “Happiness Pt 2”

  • DJ Fudge, Hallex M, Tasita D’ Mour “My love is Pure”

  • Jullian Gomes, Ziyon “Nothing can break us”

  • Kenny Bobien “Father”

  • Terry Hunter and Jay Adams “We are One”

  • Solange  “Cranes in the Sky” Kaytranada DJ Edit(available on Soundcloud)

  • Mmelashon- “I am Blessed”

  • Jose Marquez Feat Tshaka Campbell “Ode to the DJ “

  • Louie Vega “Freedom of Dance”

  • Mike Ivy & Nimo Lero “Higher”

  • Louie Vega “A new Day”

  • Bucie “Angels watching over me”

  • Byron Moore “Life Starts today”

  • Black Coffee ft Hugh Masikela “We are One”

  • Mike Dunn “Rise”

  • Men of Standard- “Surrounded”

  • Louie Vega Main Remix “Rhyze”

  • Kemdi “Still a Dancer

  • Josh Milan “Brand New day”

  • Dee Jay Alicia Soundcloud Mix “Faith” (find it on

  • Osunlade Soundcloud Mix “In Honor of” (find it on

  • Arise Radio “Kimmie RIH Live” (find it on

  • Frankie Knuckles “The Pressure”

  • Michael Watford “Love to the world”

  • Shaun Escoffery “Days like this”

  • Leela James “My Joy” (Quentin Harris remix)

  • Arnold Jarvis “Inspiration”

  • Axwell and Bob Sinclar ft Ron Carroll "What a wonderful world"

  • Louie Vega "Children of the World"


There is healing, peace, joy, and unity in house music and right now I'm in need of all of it!    I’m holding on to all of the good things in life right now.   These are just a few of the songs that get me through dark days and uncertain times.  Stay strong and encouraged family! This too shall pass!

In the meantime, let’s take care of ourselves and one another.  I'd love to hear what you listen to during tough times!

Until we meet again on a dance floor…

©Black Widow 2016



Black Widow

D.Sanders, a Chicago native, is a devoted mother, blogger and writer who is passionate about her family, friends, women's rights, living authentically and telling her story.   She is also a spoken word recording artist under the name, Black Widow. She has been writing and blogging for over 15 years providing commentary and expressing thought on life, love and relationships. Her artistry can be heard on two house music singles, “Rough”, and “Gruv Me” released by Grammy Nominated Producer and CEO of T’s Box Records & T’s Crates, Terry Hunter under the production of Mike Dunn and Dee Jay Alicia. . Both singles reached #1 on Traxsource’s Afrohouse and charted top ten overall as well reaching the top ten in their year of release.  She splits her time blogging about the Chicago Dance Music Scene on and on her book’s website,  She is excited about her debut book, The Sum of Many Things, scheduled for release in June 2017.   She wears many hats but refuses to be placed in a box.  She believes that women are "The Sum of Many Things".  Embracing all of her roles as a woman, she firmly believes in breaking free of preconceived notions of womanhood.   She believes it is her mission to define her own life experience, femininity and sexuality and not have it defined by society.  She openly shares her story with hopes that women understand their worth, power and place in this world.